Do you ever feel like everyone in your little “circle” of life – family, spouse, kids, bosses, friends – expect you to be “Wonder Woman”? To be able to magically get up, put on a cape, and whizzzzzzz through the day, and, get everything done (in what would take a normal person 8 hours to do)…. in 30 minutes! Like someone waived a “magical wand” over us to be able to do it all in ½ the time than is humanly possible? Why does everyone expect this from us women?
Who elected us Wonder Women anyway? Why do we women think we have to take on the world? I mean, we obviously do have a certain level of responsibility, especially if we are raising a family. But, we don’t have to run ourselves so ragged that we feel we are going to drop dead at 7:00 o’clock at night! We need to face it – we are NOT Wonder Women and there is no reason we should try to be. In my younger years, I used to feel like taking a breather just wasn’t in the game plan.
Occasionally, I would break away and go meet a girlfriend for lunch. A couple hours later, I was feeling guilty because I had left my kids, and I was a working mom. And you young moms, who are stay at home mothers – I applaud you. It is no easy task trying to manage a household while the kids are pulling on you all day; maybe you are even taking on the huge responsibility of homeschooling your children.
Regardless of whether you are working outside the home or inside the home, maybe someone “shames” you into teaching Children’s Church at church or becoming the room mother at school, or working all day at the school fundraiser on a Saturday. You have probably heard the saying, “The women who are the busiest, do the most and get the most done.” I think there is some truth to that one! I mean, I loved doing all the volunteer work, but sometimes I just couldn’t do another thing… for another person.
But stop, wait, you know what I have learned through these last years as I am well into “middle age”? I am NOT Wonder Woman! I can’t just wave a wand and get everything done, and sometimes I just can’t squeeze another thing into my day. And, frankly, I don’t care. And I have learned to “delegate”. Of course, my kids will tell you I delegate too much! This is a nice time in my life because I am not “running” 24/7.
Here are a few of the lessons I have learned over the years … oh, how I just wished I would have learned these lessons much earlier in life:
- JUST SAY, “NO!” If you can’t be the “snack person” for your kid’s soccer team, don’t do it – learn to say “no”. If you are not in a place to volunteer for Children’s Church, say no. Just tell the person asking right now you have too much on your plate.
- DON’T FEEL GUILTY! Don’t feel guilty for taking a few hours to yourself whether you are going out with your girlfriends, or leaving the kids with your husband and going to the mall alone on a Saturday afternoon. We must “recharge” and “renew”, otherwise we won’t be any good to anyone! I sure don’t feel guilty about any of that at this stage in my life – because I have learned; I need to do that for ME….
- PAT YOURSELF ON THE BACK! Hey, you are doing pretty good! I always say to my kids, now that are older, “Well, I must have done something right. I didn’t kill you, did I? You’re still breathing!” It’s not easy being a woman and juggling all of our responsibilities – work, home, spouse, household and kids!
- MAINTAIN BALANCE IN YOUR LIFE! All worky work is going to kill you! And, it’s no fun either. Don’t cut short the important things just to do more chores – like sitting and reading a book with your young child, or talking on the phone with your daughter who is away at college.
Put your cape away for a bit, women; take a deep breath and enjoy your life! I have a lot to learn, too, in this area… but I think I’m starting to get it!